Terroir: July 2010

Is there a difference between judging someone and disagreeing with what they do? My immediate response is yes, but I don't think it's a simple question. Mostly because I think the answer comes down to having a clear understanding of personal motivation, which is gray and complex and difficult to self-diagnose, let alone really understand in others. Usually I can tell the difference between when I'm judging someone and when I really just don't like what they're doing because I can see how much it's hurting them. But sometimes it's not that simple.

As Christ-followers, God commands us not to judge but to love. Not just because the damage judgment can cause is deep and long lasting, but because more often than not, we have no idea what's really going on in people's minds. God is the only one who fully (and truthfully) knows the human heart: "For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart" (I Samuel 16:7). God alone knows our hearts. And the eternal consequences of judging others are not insignificant. We face harsher judgment in heaven. We face the the removal of God's mercy. We face a life of relationships that are far more difficult than they are intended to be (Luke 6).

So where is there a difference between judging someone and disagreeing with their actions because you know they're hurting themselves by what they're doing? (Disclaimer: this only applies to Christ followers, non-believers are exempt) How much do you keep loving someone when you know what they're doing is wrong? damaging to themselves? I don't know. Usually I err on the side of love. It's safer. And it's so difficult to not set yourself up as a judge, even if you are convicted by God. The thing is, God's love and forgiveness for us never runs out. Ever. The Israelites (entire Old Testament), the prodigal son (Luke 15), the adulteress woman (John 8), the Bible is full of examples like these that demonstrate God's unfathomable, unfailing, forgiving love towards us.

The more my faith matures, the more I'm convinced that life of a true Christ-follower is to model this kind of relentless love. Back to my question on judgment then. How do you lovingly disagree? How do you say to someone you care about "I love you, but you can't do this anymore"? Beyond that, how do you keep loving them when their consistent response to that question is, "I don't care"? Because that's what really matters. Keeping on loving them no matter what, recognizing God doesn't call us to rescue each other. That's his job. He simply commands us to love one another as He first and continually and forever loves us...

"A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another: just as I have loved you, you also are to love one another." (John 13:34)

Terroir

Sunday, July 25, 2010

to judge or to love?

addictive behavior