A while back, I walked through a fairly in-depth study of the book of Genesis. One of the most impactful lessons I learned from that study remains Genesis 2, when God creates man and woman. "It is not good for man to be alone," He proclaims, and then proceeds to form Eve from a rib taken from Adam's side. There are so many things we can learn about God and about men and women from these few verses.
What stands out to me though, and what my life circumstances seem to have been confirming over the past several months, is that God fashioned men and women with different parts of Himself. In many ways we are incredibly similar, but women have been gifted with the servant's spirit of our Savior. And more and more it seems to me that God gave women the ability to love differently than men.
Women's hearts are fascinating. Mysterious. Even to us as women. I've spent a lot of time trying to figure out why this is lately, and the best thing I can come up with is that as a born again Christian woman, my heart is different from my brothers' in Christ hearts. To fully understand my own heart would be to fully understand God in a way that I can't. This is exciting and frightening. Exciting because I can love without abandon in a way akin to my Savior. Exciting because the more I get to know my Lord the more I come to understand myself. Still, frightening because I also have to be wise and judicious with my love. Two qualities that seem to go directly against unabandoned love, or a least lay down a few good sized hurdles.
So how do I reign in a heart I cannot fully know? How do I guard my heart as the well spring of life as my Lord calls me to in Proverbs 4? Two ways: get in the Word to write it on my heart, and moment-by-moment surrender to allow God to rule my heart instead of trying to rule it myself.
"Watch over your heart with all diligence for from it flow the springs of life." Proverbs 4:23
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